'Not something to be feared': Woman with cancer held living funeral before her death

Intimate and joyful - such was the atmosphere at the living funeral of cancer patient Michelle Ng, who was also known as Mike.

The terminally ill woman held a gathering at home on Dec 23 last year to connect with her loved ones for the last time.

"I just want to be a friend to them, as much as they have been a friend to me, while I am still alive," said Ng, who was under HCA Hospice's home hospice programme.

Ng's touching story was shared by the charity on Valentine's Day (Feb 14), where the organisation dedicated the occasion to her "most profound and final act of love" on its social media pages.

In 2021, Ng, then 27, was diagnosed with a rare form of ovarian cancer. Prior to the diagnosis, she had enjoyed cycling, running and working on her own wearables business.

At the end of 2022, Ng learnt that the cancer had spread to another part of her body.

While she sought treatment in 2023, treatment was futile, and she was referred to HCA Hospice for support and placed under its home hospice programme.

When HCA principal medical social worker Jayne Leong suggested hosting a living funeral for her loved ones, Ng welcomed the idea.

"Being mortal inspired me," she said.

"I specifically wanted to call the event a living funeral, instead of a celebration of life (another commonly used term), as I wanted death to be close to our hearts, and not something to be feared."

Visualising an event akin to a birthday party, Ng had wanted an intimate atmosphere with good music, food and words of love.

Over 30 guests, including workers from HCA, were present at Ng's living funeral.

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Attendees were encouraged to write her a final letter and to participate in a book exchange. Rai, a musician from Ng's favourite local band Jack & Rai, also performed at the living funeral.

It was a joyful day for Ng who sang and clapped along to the live performance and "infused the atmosphere with her signature quips", said the hospice.

Addressing her friends at the gathering, she said: "Thank you for making me so happy today.

"Your presence is so, so appreciated. I am grateful to hear every single laughter, to see every single smile."

Ng died on Jan 2, a little over a week after her living funeral.

AsiaOne has reached out to HCA Hospice for more information.

ALSO READ: His last Valentine's Day: Man with terminal cancer makes hand cast as keepsake for wife and unborn child

lim.kewei@asiaone.com